Shady Hues

Escape to Victory!

2008-04-17T01:17:00.001+05:30

Till high school, I used to be a fairly good student. I scored 85% in my X boards. Then, I was sent to Delhi from Solan (a small town in H.P.) for IIT coaching, coz i was identified as a 'bright prospect'. But, I had always wanted to be a cricketer. So, with renewed vigour, I completely gave up studying, and turned to cricket. I wasn't a bad player, but then, I wasn't exceptional either. It was more of a rebellion against authority.

Anyhow, my scores dipped, and I barely scraped through Class XI. I didn't improve much in Class XII. Another issue I faced was that I felt I was being discriminated against by the majority ethnic community. I flunked my pre-boards. The school called my parents, who were horrified to know that their supposedly brilliant son was flunking. My folks had to plead with the authorities to let me sit for the XII boards. Anyway, I somehow managed a 67%.

I studied a bit for Engg. entrance exams, and cleared a few. Then, I got admission to PEC, Chandigarh. Again, I wasn't quite convinced with studying Civil Engineering. Consequently, I flunked an exam each in my first two sems. In the third, I was out of action for 6 months, with a near-fatal road accident. But, to quote Charles Dickens, 'It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.' That accident changed my outlook towards life. I learnt many lessions, and I guess I matured in those 6 months. After that, I worked heart and soul to get life back on track. Eventually, I scored 61.9% in engineering.

By then, I had been written off as a bright star who had lost his glow, by family and friends. So, I decided to shift base, and move to a different city, away from everyone. That's when I took up a job at IBM's BPO in Gurgaon. I appeared for CAT '02, without any preparation. To my surprise, I got 97.5 percentile, and a call from UBS, Chandigarh. (That was the only place I had applied to.) However, I was not confident enough, and messed up the GD and interview. I was devastated, but went back to my job. After a few months of good performance, I was promoted as a trainer. Next year, I filled up the CAT form again, but chickened out of appearing for the paper. I spent another couple of years in my job - got another couple of promotions, and lots of accolades. But somehow, all my past failures haunted me.

I switched jobs, and came to Genpact in 2005. Once again, I settled into a reasonably comfortable life. It needed a jolt to break me out from my world of computer games and books. Being a Liverpool fan, I tuned in to the Champions League final between Liverpool and AC Milan. Liverpool were trailing 3-0 in the first half, and I was seething with rage! They went in at half-time like losers, who'd given up. But after 15 minutes, I was surprised to see Gerrard charging out of the tunnel, followed by his team. And lo, after 15 minutes, I was jumping with joy. Liverpool - 3 goals in 10 minutes!! Eventually, they won. I didn't rjoice, dance, or whoop with delight. I took my bike, went to a peaceful place nearby, and cried like I'd never done before.

In those 90 minutes, I had found vindication. I saw myself in the team that came back when everyone, including ardent fans like me, had written them off. I realized that all was not lost, till I decided. I went back, with renewed vigour. I decided to give my fullest to my job. For anoher year, I drove myself hard. I was quickly recognized as an efficient and good worker. Still, I couldn't bring myself to exorcise the demon of CAT. Then, life changed...

Late in 2006, a girl at office, who lived en route to my house, asked me for a lift. She and I had a small conversation. I dropped her home, and forgot about the incident. A few days later, the 'lift' became a routine affair. And before I knew it, I was deep in love with her, and vice-versa.

After listening to the story of my life, she would bring up the subject of an MBA, and I would nervously change the topic. Then, she also talked about getting an MBA and joining a coaching institute. So, on a weekend, I took her to IMS, TIME, CL etc. We discussed the options, and concluded that TIME sounded best. We went back next week to sign up. That's when she dropped the bombshell. It wasn't her who was signing up, it was ME!! I was reluctant, being more keen on a part-time MBA, but she asked me to give it just one shot.

Despite my reluctance, I had to join up. And I took the first mock they gave. Score 99.xx. I regained a bit of self-belief and vowed to give it 110%.

I had enrolled for classes in Jan '07 at TIME, and began studying hard. Days became weeks, weeks became months. I found that when the mock tests began, I would always score in the region of 95-96, but never beyond. It began to frustrate me. No matter how hard I tried, I just couldn't score above 96. The faculty were extremely supportive and counselled me regularly. Two of the teachers, Mr. banerjee, and Mr. Pankaj, always had positive things to say. They sat with me, to understand my issues, and advised me at every step. Tanveer Sir (writetotanveer), who was part of the faculty, was especially encouraging and inspiring. He was the one who introduced me to this wonderful world of PagalGuy.

Still, by September, I only had one 98+ score to my name. And if you plotted my scores, you'd get pretty much a straight line. Essentially, I felt like I'd just be knocking at the IIMs' doors but not getting in. Meanwhile, things were also getting tough on the personal front. The girl, who'd been by my side through all those times, moved on with life. Life had once again, come full circle. I lost interest in everything. Appeared for one of the mocks, and walked out after only 45 minutes. The result showed me 79 percentile. , when I scored 98+. I was at my wits' end. In extreme frustration, I walked out of a (2 hour) mock test after just 50 odd minutes. However, to my surprise, I found that I had scored 79 percentile in that test. I remembered the day a team in red had refused to die out, and come back to beat all odds.

I began preparing with renewed vigour, and decided to give one final thrust, always keeping the Reds in mind. Come D-day, I felt I was ready. Tanveer Sir met me at my center and told me, "Mr. Singla, dimaag thanda rakhna. Ho jaayega." And well, if not spectacularly, I think I have done reasonably well for myself with a total of 7 calls from top-league institutes.

Today, that team in Red is almost on the verge of another historic victory. Today, I'm on the verge of getting into a b-school. I don't really care if the Reds win or not. They tried hard, and gave their best, so they'll always be heroes to me, even if they hadn't won. I will always worship them, and go back to that famous day in 2005, whenever I need them to motivate me.

So, I'd say, forget about winning or losing, make sure you give it all! Just don't quit, ever! No one says it's easy, but then it isn't impossible either, right? Go for it, and get there!

2008-02-25T20:39:00.002+05:30

I know, it's been a long hiatus (again). But, I'm back. With more thoughts and ponderings. I watched this movie yesterday. It's called 'The Bucket List' and it left a deep impact on me. I won't give away the story (you'll have to pay for it, you know) but it will suffice to say that the characters make a list of things to do before they 'kick the bucket.' Not just that, they actually proceed to do them. Nothing special about that, except the characters are terminally ill cancer patients. So, even though it might sound macabre or dark to you, I've created my own bucket list. Here it goes:

1. Own and manage a football club

2. Watch a football match at Anfield stadium, and cry myself hoarse

3. Write a novel

4. Make someone cry with happiness

5. Visit Disneyland and be a kid once again!

6. Adopt a child

7. Do something for the underprivileged

8. Attend a Linkin Park concert

9. Have my own library

10. Go on an African Safari

I know, some of these might sound childish, or even inane. Nevertheless, it's my list of things I'd love to do before I die. There would be lots more, and some of them might take precedence over the ones listed here. But for now, this is the list. And if you're reading this, you've been 'tagged'. I'd appreciate if you leave your own bucket list in the comments section.

Reminiscences

2008-01-04T21:51:00.000+05:30

I've been sitting and staring at a blank screen that's been begging me to write something. I don't know if it's because I have nothing to say, or because there's simply too much. Whatever be the case, my barren blog still hasn't seen a post from me this year. As I set out to remedy the situation, I can't help but muse at the year gone by.

Once again, it seems time has flown. I still remember the lovely blossoms in the spring; the hot perspiration-filled days in the summer; the sights, smells, and sounds during the monsoons (UGH!!). And now, as I look around me, I can see the lights of the city bravely trying to shine through a misty curtain. Winter happens to be my favourite season (despite the constant sneezing and coughing!).

But, a whole year gone by? Unbelievable. It almost seems like yesterday that I decided to take my career places by preparing for the scary CAT. It did pinch me sometimes, to be studying and attending classes when my peers and friends were partying or having a gala time. But I consoled myself with the thought, "No sacrifice, no victory." But yeah, now, the die is cast, and as Optimus Prime said, "...fate has yielded its reward." Not quite, but it will, in the next few days...

Anyway, the past year has had other chapters too - some bitter, others sweet, some pleasant, others painful. One of them was all of these. Though it lasted nearly a year, and was beautiful till it did, it now is closed. Still, I did learn a lot. I learnt to be responsible. Plus, I learnt my own worth. While she may not have been the one for me, she did teach me to value myself, and to believe... in myself.

Still, the most beautiful chapter has been Aarbee. From two individuals who had been hanging around the virtual world for donkey's ears, we quickly progressed to chat acquaintances, phone friends, and now soulmates. The very thought of her brings a smile to my face (actually, it's more of a goofy grin). I just can't get enough of her! And no amount of thanks to the man who introduced us (Harry) will suffice. I could write reams after reams about her, but they'd still be less. Bottom line: Aarbee is wonderful, and an angel.

So, with the beginning of this lovely new chapter, I bid adieu to 2007 and turn towards 2008 wishing joy and happiness to all.

Mockingbird

2007-12-19T23:07:00.000+05:30

He was a mockingbird, a little hatchling. He had newly learnt to fly, from his parents. He dreamt - of flying to faraway lands, meeting other birds, and talking to them. He dreamt of making a nest in a faraway land. He told his parents of his wish. They were sad, but told him to go and chase his dreams and fulfil them.

One morning, he flew away. He flew over mountains, and rivers, and dense forests. He flew as far as his wings allowed him to. Tired, he stopped to rest. He found a cool stream nearby to quench his thirst. There were trees laden with exotic fruits to satisfy his hunger. There were none of the predators that his worried parents had warned him about. So, he was happy and content. He decided to stop chasing dreams, and enjoy reality for a while.

Over time, he forgot all about his dream. To him, his current surroundings seemed like paradise. He grew fat and lazy. Then, one day, he woke up to hear a new voice. The voice belonged to a beautiful sparrow. She asked him to tell her the story of his life. She made him dream once more. She made him believe in himself again.

He had his doubts, but he started readying himself for his long journey for he had begun to love the sparrow. But since he was busy regaining his strength for his journey, he was able to devote less and less time to the sparrow. Gradually, the two broke apart. One day, the sparrow flew away. He was heart-broken. He remembered all the happy times he had spent with her, and cried. He did not want to pursue his dreams alone. But, he forced himself to work hard, and prepare for his journey. He resolved to proceed on his journey alone.

He was almost ready to leave, when he heard a beautiful song. A little dove was singing a song - of sorrow and joy, of hope and despair. The song brought tears to his eyes. He requested the dove to sing to him everyday. And each day, the lovely dove would sing a special song for him. He began to look forward to listening to her each day. She became his isle in the middle of a desolate desert of emotion. Without even realizing it, he fell in love with her.

One day, when the dove sang a song that told a tale of love, he could stop himself no longer. With tears flowing from his eyes, he told her of his love for her. The dove smiled through her teary eyes, and told him that she loved him too, and wanted to be with him through his journey towards his dreams.

At the first light of dawn, they flew away together towards the horizon... towards their dreams...

Abstract Musings...

2007-11-28T23:21:00.000+05:30

Resplendent images that rule my dreams,
Intense, enchanting, enrapturing,
Coy like little birds,
Haunting, flitting in and out of my thoughts,
Asking me to own them forever.

Shady Blues!

2007-11-23T22:06:00.000+05:30

The last few days've been rather gruelling workwise. Today was especially hectic.
Sample this:

8.00 am: Woke up. Started whiling away time.
8.50 am: "What the $%#&? I am late (again)". Rushed!! Took a bath... got ready for office... ran out of the house
9.05 am: "A**h**e! Get out of my way. Saale picnic manaane aa jaate hain road pe". And countless such abuses follow....
9.30 am: Whew! Another day at work... oh heck!
10.30 am: "Another one of those rewards functions! Hell! Why? I have work to do..."
11.15 am: "The award for exemplary performance goes to.... SHADY!!"
"HUH? ME? WHAT? WHY? OH... OK"
11.45 am: Back to work
2.00 pm: Lunch! A welcome break from work
3.00 pm: YAWN!! YAAWWWNNNNNN!! Shady wishing he could just curl up like a lazy cat and sleep...
4.00 pm: Counting the minutes to freedom... 60... 59...58... damn! Too far away...
5.00 pm: Yippee!! I'm leaving... "Hey!! Before going, can you please help me with this?
"@#$@! Stuck again..."
6.00 pm: Instant plan made...to chill a bit at the malls, with friends
8.00 pm: Mom called. Had a bit of a disagreement with her
10.00 pm: Back home after dropping the gangsterz
10.26 pm: Writing a blog post

P.S. Routine, mundane day, right? NOPE! It would've been one if it hadn't been punctuated by frequent smiles brought by the one and only RB.

Moral of the Story: Remember to thank God each day for sending across that wonderful girl.

Dream...

2007-11-20T19:35:00.000+05:30

In slumber sweet, late last night,
I dreamt of a sight that filled me with glee,
a lovely vision, of us walking together,
a wondrous sight to see.

I reached out to touch you,
to caress your lovely face,
I clasped your hand in mine,
and savoured your loving embrace.

I looked into your smiling eyes,
filled with a love so sweet,
in that fleeting moment,
I felt complete, replete.

I awoke from slumber,
with thoughts of you that stayed,
with me, since that lovely dream,
and never once did fade.

Lose Yourself

2007-11-17T20:34:00.000+05:30

"Look, if you had one shot, or one opportunity,
to seize everything you ever wanted, one moment,
would you capture it or just let it slip?
....
He's nervous, but on the surface he looks calm and ready..."

Sounds like these words from the song 'Lose Yourself' were written for me. Tomorrow is C-day, and I am filled with a mix of various feelings - exhilaration, nervousness, apprehension, excitement, determination, and god knows what others. So, as I listen to this track, I can't help but think of what tomorrow will bring.

January. When I decided to give CAT a shot. Since then, life's been a rollercoaster, with loads of ups and downs. And the months have just flown by. However, currently life's on an all-time high. A good outing tomorrow will be the perfect icing on the cake.

So, I'm looking forward to it. Eagerly. As the song ends, I can't help but smile.

"...You can do anything you set your mind to, man..."

Have I?

2007-11-15T20:21:00.000+05:30

These words, written long ago, when meeting that girl who'd make life worth living was a dream, couldn't be any more true now.

Have I told you?
If I sit still and ponder,
I can hear your voice,
whispering in my ear.

Have I told you?
Often, I have waited,
in anticipation, wanting,
to be close to you.

Have I told you?
The first time we talked,
I sat up all night,
playing the conversation over and over.

Have I told you?
There are times,
when I have ached for you,
and cried with emotion.

Have I told you?
Often, I dream of you,
I dream of reaching out,
and finding you.

Have I told you?
That I’d give up everything,
just to touch you once,
just to know you’re real.

Have I told you ever?
Do I still need to tell you,
that I love you?

Never 2 Far*

2007-11-13T19:57:00.000+05:30

The happenings of the last few days have been fairly extraordinary, to say the least. I never knew I had such a romantic side to me as well. Always considered more of a calculating machine, with an extremely analytical and data-oriented approach, even towards life, I had almost begun to believe in the ascribed status. Well, perhaps, I had even started deriving some pleasure out of it.

But all that's changed. In the space of a few weeks. I have learnt that within me, there lies the ability to love another person. To an extent that even I didn't ever imagine. (Even greater than 9000!, as some of my 'mathematician' friends may snicker). And it's all thanks to Aarbee. The girl who makes me smile all the time. The girl who always has something niice to say. The girl who always has a better punchline ready. (Damn!!) The girl who occupied a corner of my mind till a few days ago, and now fills my mind with thoughts of her. The girl who I love.. a lot.

Aarbee, today, I was listening to this song, and just can't seem to get its refrain off my mind (not that I really want to)

'...and all these miles that separate,
disappear now when I'm dreaming of your face,
I'm here without you baby,
but you're still on my lonely mind...'

* The title of a track by Eminem.

Happyness!

2007-11-10T19:54:00.000+05:30

I'd always known the historical/mythological/religious significance of the 'festival of lights' but it had never meant so much to me. I've never been happier in my life. I've never wept for sheer joy, that too in public. I've never viewed the world through 'rose-tinted glasses'. But, in the last few days, I've done all of it.

There's that voice, which is music to my ears. Every word that she says, makes me smile or laugh. I just can't get enough of talking to her. Just thinking about her is reason enough for me to smile, and be happy. And I LOVE her! :-)

I went home for Diwali, had loads of fun, but missed her too. Though I'm sure both of us nearly contracted repetitive stress injury, bombarding each others' inboxes, with frequent SMS texts. And of course, my family were constantly giving me the 'raised eyebrow' look, everytime my phone beeped, and I jumped around to grab it. Although, I tried covering up by saying, 'Friends', I'm sure, the blissful smile on my face, each time I read a text gave it all away. I must've grinned/smiled so much that my face still hurts. So much so that all my pics at home have an unsmiling me, coz I just couldn't smile any more.

Everyone's been complaining about those pics, but maybe they should've tried clicking me when I was texting on the phone. :-)

On the way back to Delhi from home, I was listening to and musing about Hoobastank's song, "The Reason".

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I don't really know if she's reading this, but all I'd like her to know is that I can't say how much I love her, and that no one's brought me so much 'happyness' before.

Love you!

Shady After-math

2007-11-08T00:42:00.000+05:30

What's different about today's writing?
1. The post actually has a title! Lazy me is starting to crank up the rusted gears in the ol' brain, and get it going...
2. I'm kinda over the use of third person to refer to myself (that may just be temporary, though)

Yet another hectic day at work. Yet another day closer to C-day. So, I decided to spend the evening with friends from work. Should probably have studied instead, but it was a Diwali gettogether, before everyone goes home for the festival. Ten days to go... so from tomorrow... OPERATION KICKASS begins. I probably should've titled this post 'Shady before-math' but that doesn't sound so cool, does it? :D

Oh, I discovered what turns an ordinary man into a race car driver (no offence please, Mr, Schumacher).... elementary, my dear Watson... it's the urge to pee... Dunno about others, but I was able to make it from Sec 17 to Sec 56 (nearly 13 km) in under 10 minutes!!

P.S. I have a big grin on my face, coz someone nominated me as 'most likely to save the environment from global warming'. (Yeah ... yeah.... Captain Planet, huh?)

P.P.S. That cute girl with the lovely smile made my day yet again! I wonder how she always manages to say something really nice about me. :D

2007-11-07T00:50:00.000+05:30

Look whoz back! SHADY!!!! Surprise... surprise... suddenly, after a long silence lasting nearly a year, someone sure does seem to have a lot to say. Well, lazy folks like Shady need to be bullied outta their languor to get them to do something. As someone would say, "USELESS!!" :P

Anyway, the in-built clock in Shady's mind has been ticking away, reminding him of the ever-shortening distance between him and C-day. Let's see what the 'After-math' brings. Of course, work keeps getting crazier and crazier. Bloody demanding clients, insane deadlines, and a growing dissatisfaction with boring work... ingredients to a pissed-of Shady.

The brighter side, though... tomorrow is Shady's last working day... till C-day, so he plans to let his hair down (haha... yeah...right!) and chill and soothe his aching nerves. Ever heard of, "A movie a day, keeps CAT blues away."? If you haven't, that's OK, coz it's a Shady-ism that he coined just a few minutes ago.

Shady doesn't have much more to say to you right now, for the girl with the lovely smile might turn into the girl with the ferocious frown, if he continues to not reply to her...so 'ciao' till he's back again....

2007-11-05T20:20:00.000+05:30

Well, Shady wandered off to a great afternoon on Saturday, with a friend, who was kind (kind bole to KIND, not the weird kind) enough to click a few pics where he doesn't look like an ogre who'd eat up the photographer in the next frame. And she also joined him for paneer pizza (without paneer), and lemonade without lemons (naah... just kidding!!). She also managed to get a compliment on her smile from a salesgirl (I'd been about to compliment her, but she'd never believe me if I said so now.. hence, I'm keeping shut... )

Appeared for yet another mock test on Sunday. Finally figured out why they call them MOCKS... coz the tests MOCK at the test-taker... well.. thie one probably didn't mock me much.. but you never know... Still, last time was horrendous.. this one can only be an improvement.. :P

Today, Shady has a sore throat. (NO.. it's not becoz of non-stop yapping.) Well, that's why he decided to write a blog instead of eating away at some unfortunate soul's mind over the phone.

Bodyache... throatache... fever... not much more to ask for, in holiday season, right? BLOODY! Shady sometimes feels like renaming 'Murphy's law' to 'Shady's law'. It applies so well to him! Whenever there are holidays approaching, he just HAS to fall sick! How sick is that!! (Ahem... forgive his attempt at humour please)

Not much else to write about... but Shady'll be back before you know it... that's why they call me slim (Ahem.. don't snigger, huh?) Shady...

2007-10-29T23:47:00.000+05:30

I didn't really have much to muse about, because my mind has been wandering quite far (and is now refusing to return). Still, I'm making an attempt at writing, on Ms. RB's request. Consequently, this post is dedicated to her.

Strange, considering that a fortnight ago, I didn't even know of her existence. And today, she is one of the (few) people I trust almost beyond measure. Someone, who can be cute, friendly, crazy, intelligent, creative, destructive, funny, serious, adorable, irritating, and loads of other things, all at the same time. I'm sure it's not easy, but she does all of it with an almost uncanny flair.

She does tend to worry a bit too much, which ain't that niice, and yeah, she does create quite a drama, when taking her medicines, but then, overall, not much to complain about her. And the frequent 'puppy faces' are a potent weapon she has. However, her sense of humour is just awesome. I hate to admit it, but her timing is even better than mine! Hence, I don't really mind making fun of myself, just to amuse her. (It's surely better than she making fun of me..lol).

Really, I don't quite know what all to write, coz I could fill up reams of paper (or blog pages) writing, but I wouldn't begin to describe her accurately. However, as Priyanka used to say, "Words are never enough, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't say them."

So, RB, all I'd like to say is that it sure is great to have you around.

P.S. I forgot to add, I love your photography.

P.P.S. I also forgot to add, you might not have realized your dream of being a bus driver, but you know what, you did pick up the vocabulary. :-)

2007-10-24T23:54:00.000+05:30

As I had accurately predicted after much crystal-gazing (Yeah, rrright!!), I did need a weekend by Wednesday, i.e. today. Hell, man! Sometimes office sucks so much. And even more so, when one doesn't want to work.

I'd grabbed the morning paper right out of the vendor's hand, hoping to read about a massive network failure with our clients, leading to offices being shut, or a HUGE transport strike, or something else cataclysmic enough to ensure a holiday. But, the front page was adorned with the daily drama of Mr. Manmohan Singh vs. the Left, and the Sensex sending investors' hearts fluttering. Sad! Disappointing! Another day @ work....

So, after the usual cussing at being late, hunting for matching socks, nimbly evading the landslide that results each time I open my cupboard, I was ready for office.

That Greek fella Hercules, became a hero after completing some 12 silly tasks. Ask me what a Herculean (or rather Sumitean) task is. Getting to office through all that traffic, without uttering a single cuss word. I did that! (not quite.. .but at least I didn't use any of the bigger ones). Hercules would've retired long ago if he'd been asked to do that!

Anyway, no further details of office.. they're too traumatic to narrate, or read about.

Returning home, I studied a while, and then flaunted my culinary skills (skill? Yeah... even boiling water is a skill.. so ready-to-eat soup would be like a multi-course meal!). After that, for the first time ever in life, I had a telephonic discussion on Venn diagrams with a friend. Hehe.. Since the Venn diagram idea fizzled out rather fast, we switched over to percentages. That topic lasted for about an hour but eventually gave up its feeble attempts too. Then, it was general blah-blah, that lasted God knows how long. :-)

And apparently, it's still 'lasting' coz I'm still here... blabbering away like there's no tomorrow. But, there is! A stupid freakin' tomorrow... with the same old routine. Oh, man!! Life seems have become like:

if (day == monday, tuesday, wednesday, thursday, friday, saturday, sunday)
{

life = sucks;

}

else

life = sucks;

//end of code.... ]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] (programmer passed out on keyboard)

2007-10-22T00:12:00.000+05:30

What an evening! I haven't had this much fun in ages... well, going out with four girls (don't get me wrong... just my aunt... and cousins)... for a full party blast. We drove around, went to Bikanervala, where there were so many people milling around, that we had to leave. Then, of course, there was a big argument over where to go next. However, the voice of reason (obviously.. ME) made a suggestion that was promptly accepted by the ladies. So, we were off.

On the way, a scooterist tried to give me some driving lessons. BUGGER!! I was forced to not use the full force of my truck driver's vocab coz of the ladies sitting in my car. However, we all had a good laugh when the man kept glaring back at me, and rammed into a rickshaw puller, who then must've got loads of gyan. That was funny.

It's fun to drive around with people who're almost crazy as you are and enjoy blasting loud music from Linkin Park, or Godsmack, or Flipsyde... cool man! And kudos to my aunt for bearing heavy metal with a smile.. hehe..

Still, we had a good dinner @ Subway... with some sinful desserts from Baskin Robbins thrown in. And of course, then these girls decided to show off their newly-learnt shimmying skills by shimmying in front of the food court. I had a bodyache, and a bit of a fever, so I didn't join them, but I should have!! Though Niki (my youngest cousin) and I did perform some pieces of salsa. :D

Now... time to sign off.. and back to office tomorrow! Damn, why can't weekends last? They should've planted weekends in the middle of the week instead of the end (I know... I know)...coz I'm gonna need another one by Wed...

2007-10-19T21:39:00.000+05:30

I love sifting through my old diaries and poems now and then. Some of those yellowed, dog-eared pages contain so many snippets of my soul. Reading them today, I regained so many insights into myself, that I had completely lost over the years.

Somebody once said that "A picture is worth a thousand words."

Absolutely! In fact, some pictures may even be worth much more. However, to me, the converse is also true. Those thousands of blobs of ink on paper, do draw up many images... some vivid, some faded, some happy, some sad...

After reading wistfully, about the twists or turns my currently meandering life has taken in the past, I resolved to complete one of the long-pending items on my 'Things to do' list. I rediscovered the outline of a story I had planned to write. I will try and give it some time each day or alternate day. Let's see what comes out.

Maybe, after a few years/decades, I'll be writing another blog entry, after rereading the same old pages... who knows....

2007-10-14T22:52:00.000+05:30

Ok... I am back to writing again... nearly had a bad accident today.... made me learn a very important lesson:

"Never believe you will be able to defy Murphy's law."
Corollary: Never even imagine that you will.

(Remember these wise word, O ye reader...)

2006-12-19T15:07:00.000+05:30

I wonder... I often wonder... what would happen if one made some different choices in life? What would have happened if she hadn't been staying back late at work that day? What would have happened if I hadn't offered her a ride back home? What would have happened if she had declined my offer?
Well, I feel we wouldn't have become inseparable companions ever. We wouldn't have shared the bond that we do now. Yes, we do have our own insecurities, tensions, and problems, but we also take up each other's and try to solve them. We rave and rant at each other, throw tantrums, but we also love each other... more than we'll be able to ever admit.
I don't know.. of how long we will walk down the road together. I don't know if we will live happily ever after. All I know is that she's the girl, who I have always looking for. She is the soulmate, I've never had.
If I could just raise my hand, and wipe away all her troubles, I'd do it twice over. I know she'd do the same too.
No one's seen the future, but I sure hope we have one... together...

Reprise

I listened to the melancholy rumble of thunder,
as I walked alone in the cold November rain,
replaying each conversation we ever had,
wanting to savour each precious moment again.

I watched the storm clouds gather and disperse,
as the breeze sang, with a voice full of glee,
thinking of you, hearing your words,
wondering if you’re thinking of me.

I was crying, and the sky was too,
as I yearned for a hug, and a gentle touch,
wishing I could be somewhere near,
wanting to tell you that I care so much.

I shook my head and smiled,
as I thought of your lovely verdant eyes,
looking at me with unbridled affection,
listening to me singing my reprise.

2006-11-21T02:09:00.000+05:30

Is it the taste of the chocolate ice-cream we shared that I relish? Or is it the flavour of those interesting conversations we have? Well, it could also be the essence of that inane chatter we indulge in, and those casual glances we keep exchanging.
Whatever it is, if I ever was certain in my life that Love had arrived, now is the time! I adore her! I know she has faults, she's not perfect, but then, nor am I. As long as we can accpet each others' faults and still be harmonious, who cares?
Yet another sleepless night haunts me... I wonder if she'd be sleeping right now, or perhaps thinking about me... or maybe.. even be somewhere in blogosphere.. typing out her thoughts.. pouring out her heart... INTERESTING!!

2006-11-19T10:31:00.000+05:30

Richard Bach said,
"A soulmate is someone who has locks that fit our keys, and keys to fit our locks. When we feel safe enough to open the locks, our truest selves step out and we can be completely and honestly who we are; we can be loved for who we are and not for who we're pretending to be. Each unveils the best part of the other. No matter what else goes wrong around us, with that one person we're safe in our own paradise. Our soulmate is someone who shares our deepest longings, our sense of direction. When we're two balloons, and together our direction is up, chances are we've found the right person. Our soulmate is the one who makes life come to life."

Well, if that's true, it means she and I are soulmates. Though I guess, we still haven't unlocked our selves completely. Soulmates... is it really possible? I adore her, love everything about her. She has flaws, of course. So do I. But then, who doesn't?

Still, I feel at ease with her. However, there still is a portion of my heart that I haven't opened up to her. She still doesn't know that I keep pining for her, on those sleepless nights. She doesn't know I could do anything to be with her, even for a fleeting moment. She doesn't know that I replay each conversation we have, over and over again. Or does she? I guess there's only one way to find out...

Lonely Refrain

In mild breeze, at the ocean’s feet,

walking towards me with outstretched arms,

I saw her, my lovely lady,

alluring, with her veiled charms.

I walked towards her,

as she dazzled me with her smile,

‘I love you,’ I wished to say,

‘and I’d love for you to stay awhile.’

She sat with me, her hand in mine,

as we talked away from dusk to dawn,

We spoke of joys, of sorrows too,

till the moon’s starry convoy was gone.

Enthralled, enraptured, I listened to her,

savouring each and every word,

But she knew not what I yearned to say,

and it flew past, unseen, unheard.

Oh, how I wish for that moonlit night,

how I wish for those moments again,

when I would express my love,

and the ocean would sing my refrain.